A letter to the person who feels they cannot go on.

This month is suicide prevention month.

Dear Depressed,


If this word has entered your mind keep reading…

This word stirs many emotions.

For some they feel disgust, how could someone be so selfish.

Some feel great sadness, they know the tremendous pain of losing someone who chose end their life.

Yet others like you feel relief, the thought of not having to trudge through another day.

Suicide is awful… for everyone.

It’s awful for you to think of that option because you cannot bear the thought of another day.How to Deal with Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings and Overcome the Pain

And awful for the ones who remain to pick up what’s left of a shattered life and continue on.

Because, life does go on. But now, it goes on WITHOUT you. For all the misery you feel, you cannot begin to understand how the ones you leave behind feel.

My mom has experienced both deep depression and the suicide of her sister. So, I asked her which is worse? “Yes, the pain and despair you feel when in extreme depression is real and deep. You just want it to stop but if you can just find anything to hold on to, you will make it through that darkness. The pain of the loss of a loved one to suicide goes on forever.”Suicide is a death like no other

We loved ones are left questioning everything. Where did we go wrong, what could we have done differently. How did we miss the signs, why didn’t you ask us for help. We would do anything to have you back!

I know you, the depression sufferer, would say to us, “it’s not your fault, I just couldn’t take life anymore.” But that does not change the guilt and heart wrenching loss, that we are left with.

My life and my family’s lives have been affected by suicide many times. But I want to talk about the most recent.

My son’s first girlfriend (and someone he still cares for deeply) was Cassidy a 14 year old cheerleader who was full of spunk! She lit up a room with her silly, fun personality and beautiful smile (This link gives you insight- Remembering Cass-video ) Tragically, At 16 Cassidy made the decision to end her life.

This vibrant young person decided only this extreme measure could stop her pain. She disguised her feelings that led her to make this decision. Instead of reaching out and telling anyone.

Please do not hide your feelings, their is always someone to help! Michael Phelps-Michael is teaming up with Talkspace to share the story of how therapy helped him.

I can tell you no matter what you think; “my family is better off with out me”, “they will get over it”, “no one will miss me”, or any other negative speak you tell yourself, none of it is true!

Nothing in life, here on this earth, is more important than you. No excuse you can come up with can justify you choosing to leave. Stop putting pressure on yourself to be someone you are not. That pressure to change who you are adds to your depression. You were Created uniquely you. Embrace that!

When you feel the pressure in your mind and the thoughts swirling in your head get out and walk! Walk, run, exercise whatever you can do to get moving.Tips to reduce depression naturally Get outside, feel the sun, smell the earth, take in the sounds of life! If you live in a city go to the park -find some nature.

We were designed to spend more of our time outside!

Listen to music, get out of your thoughts. Turn it up and soak it in. Music & your brain

Just do anything to get out of those thoughts!

You have a future. Life ebbs and flows. Trust the process, have FAITH you were designed perfectly, uniquely YOU!Comparison-the thief of joy

Cassidy Joined For Hope Foundation

Peyton Heart Project

Looking for help?

Final thought, get tested for the MTHFR genetic mutation. Reasoning behind thought here Members of my family have this mutation and take Methylated Folate. Since taking this once a day they have gotten off all anti-depressants!!


  1. Thank you for speaking so empathetically and openly about this. I’m sorry you & your family have been affected by it. Suicide sends a shiver up my spine. Hearing about Cassidy hit close to home – I struggled with suicide around her age as well. I’m sorry for the suffering all of you have been through. Your son was very young to have to deal with something as heavy as that, and I’m sure that’s impacted him. Peace, love, and healing to all of you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am sorry you have had those thoughts. Anxiety and depression are messy. Seems to be some of the most beautiful souls deal with these monsters in their heads. I am grateful you held on and did not give in. That is the the key is to find something to hold onto and to talk to others about how you are feeling. Sounds like you have a wonderful mother who is with you every step of the way!

      Liked by 1 person

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